I cant help anymore

I cant help anymore, its normal to feel insecure in every women. I dont see the reason why ou have to do this. The only reason i can convince myself is you are not into it anymore. For almost so many months you kept claiming that i never change. Now that i try so hard you left.You broke us up. Though its really painful, but to think about it, you gave up this relationship so easily, i didnt play behind your back? i didnt hurt you as much. Its just some words. Cany you accept me a little like how i accepted you. ? Yeah, sometimes whatever you say its true. I shouldnt have try so hard to hold things back.. I am going to give myself a chance to relieve from all this pain, and forgetting all the pain that you give , since april 2006 , i step into your life when its so complicated, i played your games for so long. Hold on for the only reason that i believe. But it come to an end whereby i am still crying under my blanket. Hated this kind of life so much. Why do i have to dwell whereby you dont seems to be bothered anymore. ? Everyone knows that nobody is perfect. But you want me to be so perfect. For whatever that happens to me now, i dont know what is love ? Tell me what is love? So what if you are faithful ? People wont judge or stay because you are faithful and nice , they judge you by your negative points so forever he will see you as someone who will nvr change... Look ... it turns out to be hatred... i dont have to hate anyone in my life. I dont see a need. I will just tell my self that there is no RIGHT or WRONG ... Dont tell someone you have changed so much , because he will only judge you by your negative points. I gave up everything .. i gave up everything. I dont know whether am i saying things because i am angry, Buti typed it out following my heart.. You will never undersstand because you judge and left me due to what? Its all my fault. Because i have to accept that you are like that. But i feel really demoralised by you.. I dont want to hate you. please dont make me that way.